Broadside

Designed 4 Demolition

Core, lvl1 DO NOT USE!

[ Warning: this unit may be hazardous to your health ]

Review by Legacy. Read Tactical Commander's version here.

Buildpic: GAH!!!!! WHAT THE HELL? THIS THING LOOKS LIKE A CHEAP RHINO 3D RIPOFF!!! This thing looks totally unrealistic to either a real TA unit, or real life! The unit needs a lot of work, lightsource, and the background...looks totally cheap and unrealistic. Merging is missing, the unit is flawed (just looks like a unfinished NURBS model, and the only thing I like about it is the angle, BUT THAT'S IT!

Buildpic: 1 

Model: NO!!!!!! THE SIMPLICITY OF THIS MODEL, AND THE DESIGN MAKES ME WANT TO PUKE!!! This unit looks like a FREEKING coat rack, which looks like it holds two SPEAKERS!!! I mean, it looks like something you would buy for a home theatre system for crying out loud!!! Texturing is a FUCKING JOKE!!!...they're all the same freeking texture, except the missile launchers! Hell, the missile launchers defy LOGIC!!! Like, HOW DO YOU LOAD MISSILES INTO THOSE THINGS?! THEY'RE HANGING OFF OF A TINY MOUNT!!! AND THERE IS NO BASE!!! IT ALL TURNS AS ONE WHOLE THING!!! AND DID I MENTION THAT IT AIMS INTO ITSELF?!!! I don't see how they would load...and the corpse? It's just a pile of same-textured faces in a heap...
Another FUCKING maddening problem with this DEMENTED model is that IT HAS A 2X2 FOOTPRINT, WHILE THE ACTUAL SIZE IS CLOSER TO 3X6!!! THIS IS OUTRAGEOUS!!! THIS IS MADDNESS!!! THIS IS INDESPICABLE!!! AND FOR THIS I WILL KILL STORM FOR NOT ENABLING NEGATIVE SCORES!!! OH, FUCK IT!!!

Model: 0

Script: This is not right...this is not right...THIS IS NOT FUCKING RIGHT!!! How in HELL does a TURRET BOUNCE AROUND LIKE IT WAS NOT SCREWED DOWN TO THE GROUND?!!! I mean, normally I wouldn't count it, and even though the aiming is fine, but DAMNIT!!! IF I SEE ANY MORE BOUNCING TURRETS GOING AROUND IN MY FAVORITE GAME, I'M GOING TO GO CRAZY!!!

Script: 0

Balance: WARNING: MUST BE 18 OR OLDER TO READ THE FOLLOWING SECTION!!! Any insult was not intended. Beware of epiliptic seizures, and all forms of mental injury. If you are a mother, and over fifty, please turn off the monitor. If you have any relation to the deceased unit, please do not read the following. We at URC are not at fault for any damages caused to yourself and keyboard. Be wary of people mistaking your laughter as a sign on insanity.

[ GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ]

Balance: 0-

My score: *To Broadside* I HATE YOU!!! I HATE YOU AND ALL OF YOUR KIND!!! BEGONE FROM EXISTANCE!!!!!! AND NEVER COME BACK!!!!!!! MY SCORE IS SO LOW FOR THIS UNIT, THAT IT WOULD MAKE HELL A PIT STOP!!!

My score: ZERO!!! ZIP!!! ZILCH!!! BEGONE!!!!!!